Come each new day, I keep postponing the long overdue chore of clearing out the cupboards, overflowing now with ageing and in consequence ill fitting clothes, which have not been able to keep up with my own growth over the years. These are the clothes now waiting to be discarded, given away to deserving souls who could and would use it joyfully with the least bit of fuss. Llittle by little, one at a time, I had cleared and collected over a period of months quite a big bundle, wrapped up in an old bedsheet, stowed in one corner of our enclosed balcony, awaiting carriage to its final destination.
My task is not over by any means : there was quite a lot more in the several cupboards that needed to be cleared, but I didn't have the heart to part with my close companions of many years past. I have so many dresses that don't fit me now , but somehow I keep living in the dream that one day I will surely be able to fit back into them. But alas ! for the past 2 to 3 years I have only managed to add on a few kilos and no amount of exercise or a strict dietary regimen consisting only of health foods has been able to win me the battle of my bulge.
Reluctantly I gave up my hopes of ever reverting back to my previous size, and boldly decided to give away all the dresses that I had not used in the last 2 years. The saddest part was that they all looked pretty new : anyway there was a job to be done with gritted teeth and girded loins.
Once I started the sorting out business, it looked like it was going to take ages, so I decided to forego my regular exercising over the weekend. For 2 whole days, working tirelessly, I kept clearing everything from the overflowing cupboards, while also simultaneously keeping my wardrobe neat and in order. It seemed like I had done hours and hours of strenuous exercise, although I had scarcely moved a few paces from my spot.
Finally, after nearly two days of backbreaking work, I finally had a few more big bundles of clothes as company for the other older bundles, waiting patiently to be carted away to destinations as yet unknown.
It felt so good, almost a cathartic feeling to be rid of all the unwanted things. I don't know what makes us hold on to old things that have become practically useless for us. Why can't we just give them away as soon as we realize that they will never be used by us ( and this includes husbands also, hehe ) ?
I know they’ll have an afterlife in some other place, serving somebody else. Once the items were gone, I paused to think how I felt : I was at once very happy and very relieved as though a great big load had been lifted off my back and I congratulated myself for being able to let go. This little act made me realize that there comes a time when you have to let go a little in return for a little slice of peace.
You can’t be skinny and be healthy at the same time, and acknowledging this fact is important for mental peace and balance. And that means not looking back with sadness at your once slender figure and the clothes you draped it in. The important thing is for you to stop loving the clothes that don’t love you. Having a wardrobe that fits you makes more sense. Even if your body has experienced a small, but healthy change (in other words, if you’ve gained a little weight that was unintentional, but is still perfectly healthy), it’s worth having a wardrobe that works with you, rather than against you.
I also think it is important for all of us to remember that our bodies are not immutable. They develop with us. They adapt puberty, childbearing, and menopause. They reflect growth. So, give your body the freedom to evolve. But if for some reason old clothes are holding you back from self-acceptance, then do yourself a favor and plunge headlong into some spring cleaning. Does it mean defeat?
No-it signifies growing up, embracing change, embracing the inevitable and also embracing the peace within.
No-it signifies growing up, embracing change, embracing the inevitable and also embracing the peace within.
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